More often than not, we are judged by just about everybody around us and we reciprocate in almost the same manner – Judging!
Sometimes when I forget that I am being judged, I almost suffocate with the intention of meeting people’s expectations. Then I realise why am doing it?? if it doesn’t make me happy and satisfied to any level, I shouldn’t be wasting my energies. A typical case of victims of judgement are the housewives, in a country where women’s empowerment has taken a big leap!
I wont blame anyone. I myself was very judgemental, till I fell in this category. I was doing good in my studies and then my career! then came a decision that changed my life and of the judges around me. Thank God for my carefree attitude – most of the time 🙂 I have not given a damn to what people think of me as a non-earner, no matter how much I slog with my son.
I think earning money is much easier than taking care of a baby at any stage. Their curiosities have no end, and if they get the right answers at the right time you have his future set – if you consistently do it for next 14 years!!!! Its another thing that being dependent on somebody is the damn-est thing that can happen to you, any day. Be it a financial dependency or a physical. The latter is a definite nightmare. Unfortunately I have been through both. When I was immobile for a couple of months I was with my parents and the journey was a lot comfortable.
Coming back to judgement, since the day I left my job and joined my husband for good, the relatives have been waiting for me to join back and start contributing to their son, brother, whatever who is my husband. its irrespective of what I do for my child or that my child is remarkably better than the relatives for the reason that I am around to make him that. I am not trying to boast here, just pointing out that taking care of a child is now considered an escapist approach rather than a genuine effort.
I am not totally jobless either. I assist my dad, manage the online reputation of his company and train our students on communication skills. Since it is a start-up, my dad cannot give me a salary though all my expenses are taken care of since I stay with them. So in a way I am saving a decent amount of husband’s salary. but this goes unnoticed because there is no Physical form of money earned! Huh!
In India, a girl working with her parents and top of it staying with them is the worst she can do to the judging eyes! or say the best she can do! They feel they have got all the freedom to say nasty things, give taunts and try to make her feel helpless that she runs away from the situation!
How I hate this part of human nature. Poking nose where you have no business! Well, now I enjoy these people and take a sadistic pleasure in them having trouble with my lifestyle. with my choices in life! all said and done, we must genuinely try not to judge the surroundings, if you can help someone by your nature, go for it! If its not helping and definitely putting a question mark in the other person’s mind then we should stay away from their business. trust me, they are more worried for themselves than what you can offer in your sweet swording words!!!
Who will make those nasty ppl understand this !